The "Too Busy" Dilemma

I get it. We live in a busy world, especially if you are a student. You got (presumably) 5 courses, maybe a part-time job or social societies to attend to, exercise to squeeze in, plus your Netflix cue isn’t going to roll through itself. Like I said, I get it. I am busy too, even though I am not really that busy, but I have lots of things I want to do. For example, I write or edit written work 2-3 hours a day so that I can contribute to three blogs, publish my own short stories and slowly work on a novel. Furthermore, I spend several hours a day recording music, an hour working out, and I try to watch a new TV show or film. Of course, these things are not essential, but they keep me “busy”.

But here is the thing I am noticing more often than not: nobody has time to do anything anymore because they are “too busy”, particularly in the context of dating and social events. We need to meet up for a group project, or maybe I could use a hand organizing a school event, or maybe I just want to go out with you… Well, in any case, that person is probably too busy. But here’s the deal: there have maybe been a few times in my life when I have actually been too busy to set aside an hour or two for someone over the course of a week. To follow up on this, there have been a TON of times when I did NOT make the same time for someone in the run of a week, when I clearly could have. In fact, there’s many things I choose not to do over the course of any given week… but I could never admit that I was "too busy" to do it. 

What I am trying to say is that there is a huge difference between actually being too busy to make time for someone and not wanting to make the same time. I do know a few people who are legitimately too busy to make time and we understand each other on this matter very well, but I know way more people who fall into category number two. This isn’t to say that I’m knocking people either. Like I said, I skip way more things than I go to. The thing I don’t understand though is why people make up this “too busy” excuse for not doing things or getting together. I wonder, is it a self-deception, where people actually think they are too busy for other people? Maybe we tell ourselves this in order to try and be productive when in reality we end up procrastinating too much. Or maybe you don’t want to let the other person down, so you make them think it’s you and not them. Whatever the case, I find it very frustrating…and that’s because I love honesty.

You aren’t feeling it this week? Maybe you are not at all interested in what I’m asking you to do? To me, there is no problem with that. In fact, there’s nothing I like more than hearing that because then I have a definite answer…and because it lets me stay in and watch Netflix (win/win). But you say you are too busy? I just don’t buy it. I am a busy person, but let’s say a girl I am interested in asks me to get together for a date…well I can tell you that in my 50-hour work week, I’ll be damn sure to find a time that works, or better yet I’ll make the time. If I don't want to go? I'll tell them. 

So while I am just thinking out loud (as I always do), I wonder if maybe we couldn’t start being a little more honest with one another. People may say that the truth can hurt sometimes, but I think if we all got used to the truth, it could be rather refreshing. Or, maybe the truth is that we really don't have time anymore. I'd like to hope not, but who knows.

Anyway, the next time you ask me to go to that important event of yours, don’t worry about whether or not I am too busy to go… I’ll just tell you I’m not interested ;).